In recent years, I obsessed over New Years Resolutions. I’d plan for days about all the things I wanted to accomplish, I’d print them out in big font and tape them somewhere I couldn’t miss. These goals were typically large and daunting (save $10,000, finish a triathlon, read 50 books) and the execution crumbled in weeks to come.
I don’t think I know what I’m capable of.
I never thought I was capable of biking across America. I never thought I was capable of landing my dream job at 23. In other moments, I thought I was capable of telling someone how I felt and I wasn’t. I thought that just this month I was capable of confronting a big issue and then I froze up.
But I think I’m figuring it out. Aren’t we all? 🙂
Getting older is great. I can really pinpoint the time-wasters, including people and things. And dropping those things is a lot easier because I care less what people think about me. At 24, I’m a bit more blunt and my tolerance for drama and moodiness is much lower. And it’s just freeing. If there’s a question, I ask it. If there’s something I feel, I say it. Okay, not all the time, but I see this part of me opening up more and more and it’s such a beautiful thing.
Maybe 2014 isn’t about making goals, but choosing an attitude of sorts, like having more chutzpah and expressing gratitude. Or faking confidence and asking hard questions. Maybe this year isn’t about concrete, tangible things to cross off the list, but growing more as a person. And if I happen to finish a half-marathon along the way, great.
Cheers to a year of discovery and bliss.
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