Can I just tell you how entertaining it is to watch people dissect someone’s Facebook post or text message.
“Oh, I bet she said this because she wants attention from him.”
“He’s probably just trying to make you jealous.”
“She’s probably being passive aggressive with her blog post.”
“Yeah, I don’t care for her… she doesn’t respond to my emails.”
Can I also express my annoyance and frustration with people who hear one side of a story and then form a (sometimes rather harsh) opinion? From work experiences, personal friendships and everything in-between, I’m so tired of people assuming other people’s intentions. Why don’t you just ask someone why they aren’t responding to you? Why do we assume the worst from a text message (or lack thereof)? Um, hi. My name is Emily and I’m also equally guilty of doing it.
I was friends with a guy in college who was interested in me and I wasn’t feeling it on my end. His mentor thought I was leading him on and I was in the wrong for the situation. He proceeded to make comments about me in the community saying I had “relationship issues” based on one experience that didn’t even involve my participation. You’ve been there, right? It feels really crappy. Yet, we do it to other people. Listen to one side, form judgements and treat people how we feel they deserve to be treated.
Launching Pop Up Yoga in Des Moines has opened my eyes to the toxic thoughts and assumptions people have even though they’ve never even asked a single question to me or my fellow co-founder. It’s made me really sad, too. Misunderstandings happen and they suck, but it also means that people believe my intentions are impure, selfish, etc. Bummer feeling. How can we be better about giving someone the benefit of the doubt? Why is everything a competition?
I read this quote a super long time ago & it really landed in my heart: Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Most of us are just trying to get by, figuring out what we believe, what we want to do with our lives & things are messy. Period.
Today, more than most days, I’m trying to really, truly live in my belief that people are good. I don’t want to get caught up in assuming people’s intentions. It’s such a waste of time and energy to dissect communication. How many assumptions have you made purely based on this post? No, for real, what do you think I’m “really trying to say?” Because isn’t that what we do? We try to read between the lines because that’s what we have to train ourselves to do since so few people actually say what they mean and mean what they say.
If I don’t text you back, it’s not because I don’t like you. If I don’t say hi to you at the coffee shop, it’s not because I think I’m better than you.
I don’t know. These are just some things I’m feeling lately & wanted to share. Our society is really quick to hate on people and I don’t really want to be that person. I want to give people second chances, I want to empower them to love themselves so they can love others, and I want to stop overanalyzing things. It’s exhausting, isn’t it?
If life could just be filled with sunflowers & delicious food, I don’t think I’d ever have a negative thought again.